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so there I was... cruising, on a Saturday about twilight, through Pacific Beach CA, with the top off and the windows down. smiling at the two bikini clad cuties in the convertible VW next to me. When "IT" happened to me for the first time! I depressed the accelerator pedal, and the car surged and hesitated and convulsed like the village drunk in a gutter, while it made an awful sound from the exhaust like a nitrous fed popcorn popper. this whole dramatic display of discontent without throwing up the Check Engine light. WOW, the embarrassment, not about the girls... you can find those anywhere, but a corvette on the side of the road with the hazards on and the hood pointed straight to the sky, like a flag, a big white flag! I was ashamed to bring discredit to my corvette driving brothers!! So after about 15 mins of me staring at my LT1 the same way a monkey looks at a math problem, I began unplugging and replugging every electrical connector I could get my paws on, to ensure proper connectivity. then I attempted to start my car, successfully to find it running as it usually would.... I immediately headed for home. then just as my destination came in sight, my gleaming white corvette does "IT" all over again, but only above 3000 rpms, then as I drive a little farther, it starts doing "IT" at 2500 rpms. and then at 2000 then 1500, and you get the picture, as my optispark equipped disaster limps into the driveway like a three legged giraffe, I kept thinking "what could cause such an odd problem, without throwing any trouble codes?" then the strangest thing occurred.. a little orange gleam of hope lit up on the driver info center, "SERVICE ENGINE SOON". So I scream into the house, shouting "I need a paperclip NOW!" And sure as breakfast. I bent that unsuspecting little shiny innocent paperclip up into a 1994 corvette OBD 1 code reader and inserted my shiny new tool into the number 4 and 12 ports in the black pluggy thingy under the dash, then I proceeded to put the key into the ignition, then give it a little twist... then there they were... DTC CODES! 4 of them, wow... I was SO hopeful to find that my trusty On Board Diagnostic would tell me what to fix to make my little white corvette as good as new. DTC #12: of course, means nothing, DTC #97: VSS Output Circuit, DTC #42: Ignition Control Circuit Shorted. DTC #48: Mass Air Flow Sensor Circuit. Oh yea.. Somewhere amongst all of this nonsense my digital speedometer decided it would be fun to let me guess how fast I was going, rather than doing its only natural duty. Oh the joy of a LT1 corvette with 143000 miles. Well . I took my car to my good buddy's shop and convinced him to allow me to occupy a hoist and borrow some tools for a bit, then away to work I went. and oh boy was it fun. I replaced the VSS, Then checked the wires to the PCM for continuity, they were good, then on to the MAF, I again checked the wires, they were good, I gave the MAF sensor itself to a mechanic at the shop and asked if he would test it for me, it was good, so on to the ignition. again here I go with my gigantic yellow FLUKE meter, only to discover that all wires are Perfect! Being as I had it all torn apart, I replaced the plugs, wires, and ignition coil, and changed the engine and trans oil and their respective filters, and a fuel filter for good measure, while cleaning the manifold and injectors free of carbon buildup. Couple of hours and a few scraped knuckles later, I pack up shop, thank Mike for all his help, and away I go, out for a little test drive, as soon as the under-hood temp raised, it started acting up, doing "IT" again. not the engine coolant temp, it was at 215 before I hit the freeway, then down to 195 as soon as I was to speed, ass soon as I hit traffic... again we went with the popcorn popper action. I popped the hood for 15 min or so, looked for any loose connections, fired it up to find the coolant still over 200, but the car running great, wonderful, outstanding, until heat builds under the hood again. So now I know my limits. As I am a "less than wealthy" active duty Marine, I don't have another car to drive, so I carefully plan my trips to and from work at the cooler times of the day when there is no traffic. A few days later, im driving down the I-5, and my car freaks out! It stalled dead from 2200 rpms, all the lights in the car flashed and all *** broke loose at 85 mph in the cockpit of my little white corvette. Buzzers were going off radio was beeping and cutting in and out, all the lights in the Driver Info Center were flashing all the dash and interior lights were blinking. So again I am furious with my 12000 dollar paperweight with 315/35 r 17 tires. I waited until the urge to set my pretty little white corvette on fire diminished to a simple curiosity of "W T *** then I reattempted to start the car to find yet another orange light of hope. DTC #36: Distributor Ignition System High Pulse., I tried to restart the car again, it fired up, ran fine all the way to work. then last night, after work, I walk to my car only to find it dead, no voltage. Battery has no charge. with no reason, the battery simply bled out and died. As I stare at this disastrous yet beautiful white corvette, I recall my child hood. memories of my dad and grandpa, (both GM Prototype builders, with a lot of experience at the Milford proving grounds) speaking of this wonderful new LT1, with its reverse flow cooling and optical ignition thingy, wonderful stuff, as we did donuts in the K-Mart parking lot in a Mock built go-fast Caprice, 2 years later to be known as the resurrected "Impala SS". Don't get me wrong I love GM and I will never buy anything else. But *** what the *** is wrong with this car? Please help, I beg you, if you have any inclination of what could be troubling my baby. Please help us.
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